On Group Membership and Taking Offence at Dumb Jokes

February 06th, 2009

I’ve been following a discussion on Chris Bateman’s blog that started out having to do with Islamophobia but later on, as most conversations tend to do, veered off into the general topic of whether or not it’s justified to take offence at jokes directed towards a social group that one belongs to. The point was raised that “individuals who do not feel strong affiliation with any group (ethnic, religious or cultural) sometimes struggle to appreciate the concerns of those who do draw upon such groups for their sense of identity”, and a couple of responses — both, quite tellingly, from white men — expressed that they did indeed feel more like “individuals” than “members of a group”, and therefore couldn’t for the life of them understand how people could possibly get so fired up about those damn jokes.

I have to admit that there was a time — comparatively recently, in fact — when I expressed the same sort of attitude. I’m a woman of mixed race, but I’ve never felt like a stereotype of either of those groups, so why not just ignore said stereotypes? And yet, as of late, I’ve been noticing with increasing frequency that in the society I live in, “default person” essentially translates to “young white male heterosexual”, which means that if you don’t fit into one of those default categories, most people will see you as part of a “different” group, even if you yourself don’t. After a while, there’s just no escaping the “wow, she’s a GIRL!” or “wow, she’s NOT WHITE!” sentiments, no matter how hard one tries to ignore them. Whether I like it or not, I am defined by my gender, and I am defined by my mixed race.

So, do I get offended when people make sexist/racist/insert your favourite “ist” here jokes? Hell yes I do, although I think it has less to do with being offended personally than it does with being saddened by the thought that people even feel the need to put others down for their own amusement. And when people who are privileged enough to be seen as “default” accuse those who are not of being overly sensitive… well, I can’t help but be sceptical of their claims. Maybe I should just ignore them.

5 comments.

5 Comments So Far...

  1. organic io February 6th, 2009 2:27 pm

    I’m default, and I take offense to you ignoring me!

    Psych!

    But for real, I can empathize largely with Sirc’s comments on only a game. I guess we “just don’t get it”, simply put.

  2. Rikard February 7th, 2009 4:19 am

    I read the blog post you linked to, and agree with it: “freedom of speech must at times yield to principles of offence (and I do not suggest that legislation is the correct way to approach this issue)”. That quote pretty much sums it up. Rule #1: Be considerate.

    Hmm… “young white male heterosexual” – yes, that’s me, but I’m also a Christian so I don’t fit into the “default person” label (at least here in Sweden) and do meet my share of things to take offence at.

    So, do I get offended when people make sexist/racist/insert your favourite “ist” here jokes? Not always. It’s also important to remember to not take offence too easily, or things will turn silly (or worse).

  3. SSH February 9th, 2009 1:59 am

    I always categorised you as a “sensibilist”, Deidra… you discriminate against people who are not sensible.

  4. default February 9th, 2009 5:45 pm

    Defaults make fun of Defaults and you don’t see defaults complaining.

    http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/

  5. Chris February 9th, 2009 11:59 pm

    A friend of mine who now lives in Ohio was the first to note to me that it’s principally white male hetrosexuals who don’t understand why people would find “ist” jokes or various other forms of prejudice offensive.

    I don’t think it’s wrong to make jokes about other people, but I do think it’s crazy to believe that because a joke has humour as its intention it can’t be offensive. Confusing intent with effect is usually a mistake.

    But as for putting people down for their own amusement, we seem to be wired as a species to make hierarchies, and part of this is picking on the “runt”, something we mammals share in common with many bird species. I accept this (reluctantly) at the personal level, although I don’t participate myself, but I object to it strenuously at the cultural level.

    Thanks for extending the reach of this piece by posting about it here!

    Best wishes!

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