Designer’s Block
August 13th, 2008The nice thing about having kept up this blog for over three years is that when I’m feeling anxious and out of sorts about something or other, I can pull up the archives and discover that I was complaining about the very same thing two years ago, and that I was eventually able discover a solution to my problem and move on. Right now, I’m at yet another point in my life where my most recent finished work is making me cringe in comparison to what I think I can accomplish right now. Interestingly, this was also the case in September 2006. Of course, after I wrote that particular post, I went on to create… *goes back and counts* …five more interactive experiments since then. At the time, I thought I was improving leaps and bounds over my older old stuff, but now I’m not so sure. I mean, yes, I tried a lot of new things… but did that make my work any good?
I’m also at a point where the stories aren’t really coming to me. Or rather, I can’t come up with a new, original story that I’d like to stick with for any length of time. This tends to make me feel inadequate as a creative person; if I’m not being creative, then what use am I to the world? At a point like this, I can theoretically “remake” some of my old stuff to make it more polished, but I have a surprisingly strong aversion to actually doing so. Perhaps it’s because of the way I think of my work at a given period of my life as a “time capsule”. I don’t want to mess around with the content, and I find the idea of doing a direct port to other systems/engines to be completely and utterly dull and not worth doing unless someone’s giving me gobs of money.
Ah well, at least I’ve got Stage! to keep me busy for now. And DeathSpank too, for that matter. Both are things I know will end up far superior and polished in comparison to my solo stuff. There really is something to be said about having other people around to complement your strengths and weaknesses with their completely different strengths and weaknesses. I just need to get over the idea that I always have to be coming up with things on my own in order to be properly recognised and respected.
August 13th, 2008 at 9:56 pm
Deirdra, you have outshone so many others in the solo department that you should need no ego-boost to motivate you past your current crisis… But those of us with less talent may thank you for showing such human and humble conditions, just like the rest of us.
Anyway, writer’s block will pass, just don’t dwell on it and consume your mind with fine distractions and eventually the writer’s block shall destroy itself in boredom leaving you with more work than you know what to do with…
PS… If you’re heading to PAX again this year we should set up Lunch or something!
August 13th, 2008 at 10:39 pm
And what’s about your Last Express-styled project?
August 13th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
It would certainly be my preference that you didn’t remake your older games. They are great as they are, and I like your idea of a time capsule. Good you have that teamwork going on there. As a fellow semi-loaner I understand that need for balance between alone time and collaboration. It interests me that you find it hard to find a story you can “stick with”. Story is so important, and I hadn’t thought of this before, but as the designer I’d imagine you’d want to like the story and characters as much when you finally put them to bed as you did when you started.
August 14th, 2008 at 9:38 am
Max: I will indeed be coming to PAX, and lunch sounds absolutely fabulous.
Cyrus: Sorry if my wording didn’t come out clearly in my last post. Feeling inspired to create something doesn’t necessarily mean I’m able to follow through with it. Also, I should point out that I don’t want to create a “Last Express-styled project”; rather, I’d like to use some of its most effective gameplay mechanics in a new story of my own. I just don’t know what that story is yet.
Muse: Thank you.
August 14th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
About DeathSpank… will it have that “gameworld-exploring” approach?
August 14th, 2008 at 10:11 pm
I can’t really talk about DeathSpank in too much detail. NDAs and stuff, you know.
August 15th, 2008 at 8:02 am
Play a lot of games you don’t like, watch a lot of movies you don’t like, read a lot of books you don’t like. Then you’ll have hundreds of ideas for better stories than they had.
August 15th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
Oops, I meant “semi-loner”, not “loaner”. (typos, sheesh!) I did not mean to imply I would semi-loan you or your readers anything. Although, who knows what the future holds?