Time Travel
September 11th, 2006This evening, I played Cubert Badbone after not having touched it for ages, or at least what seems like ages. I can’t believe it’s already been four years since I made that game, and at the same time, I can’t believe how much I’ve grown up since then.
Playing games you made a long time ago kind of feels like coming across a box of your old school stuff, and seeing the drawings and writings you made back when you were a kid. On one hand, you cringe a bit because of their relatively terrible quality compared to what you’re capable of making now. On the other hand, you feel all happy and fuzzy because they bring back so many happy, fuzzy memories of the time you made them.
Playing Cubert, in a way, felt like travelling back in time; in a way, the game itself is a time capsule of my early-to-mid-teenage self. There are so many little inside jokes taken from my own life that I put in there that no one but myself would get, e.g. one of the humans in the game was loosely based on myself, while the others were loosely based on some good friends I had at the time. It made me smile.
And yet, honestly, what was I thinking, using that overly-ornate, hard-to-read font all throughout the game?
I also played TGTTPOACS a month or so ago, after not having even touched it for a while either. It was definitely much of an improvement in my eyes over Cubert, especially in terms of writing and design. Even Heather Logas liked it, which definitely must mean something. And yet, after reading someone over the Internet complain that TGTTPOACS barely had any animations in it, playing it again made me realise, “my God, he’s right! What was I thinking; I’m no artist! I animate like a programmer! Serves me right for studying computer science…”
Mind you, spending the past months hooking stuff up for Sam & Max (which has TONS of awesome art and animation all over the place) probably made me slightly more biased and snobbish in my assessment. In any case, it was sometime around then that I came to the conclusion that teamwork really isn’t all that bad, and that it’s okay to stop being a control freak and let people who are better artists than me do the artwork, and that I should focus more on getting better at design and programming. Oh, and writing too, because being able to write is nice.
I can say, however, that I’m very proud of the fact that my games have actually gotten finished. Cubert, especially, was a great achievement in my eyes not necessarily because it was well-written or designed, or had great graphics, but because it was proof that I could stick with something long enough to have it see the light of day.
September 11th, 2006 at 11:27 am
I heard many times at PAX how important “Finish!” is, and it is one of those general pieces of resume advice that you hear a lot. Just having your name on a project that was finished says a lot. My school’s football team has shirts this year with “Finish!” due to two major 4th Quarter losses (ie, ahead for 3/4ths of the game, but lost to a comeback). I think that I also need to take it as a personal motto for the next two years or so… I need to focus on making the projects that I have finished and can finish shine, and stop thinking about the millions of projects that didn’t or couldn’t finish.
September 11th, 2006 at 10:05 pm
I don’t have much to say, but I thought this was a really nicely written post.
(Even though you’re only talking about yourself!)
September 12th, 2006 at 12:09 am
Thanks, I think.
September 15th, 2006 at 8:45 pm
heh heh. it’s a compliment. I find whenever I write about myself on a blog, nobody cares! But I thought it was a nice post.
September 15th, 2006 at 10:19 pm
Heh. Sometimes, I actually like reading people writing about themselves. But I’m more inclined to do so when they write about their thoughts and feelings rather than what they did last Saturday at that party and that sort of thing.
Hmm… I swear I’ve written those exact words in another blog comment somewhere! I forget where, though…
September 16th, 2006 at 4:58 pm
Hmmm, that’s a very wise point! I’ll have to keep that in mind. I think I have a tendency to report the facts rather than what I think, since I usually save that for my fiction.
September 18th, 2006 at 7:52 pm
Listening to some of my older recordings always makes me cringe, when I think about how poor the equipment and performances were (still are, to an extent). But I’ll tell you, nothing feels more fuilfilling in life than reaching that point at the end of a long, hard slog, where things start to fall into place and it really does look an awful lot like what you set out to make.
I’m glad you’re still able to attach more than just warm sentiment to your past projects. I truly hope they help pave the way towards a very bright and interesting life.
Goodnight.
October 9th, 2006 at 7:27 am
Hey, we had a discussion about this at the Bulgarian restaurant in San Rafael, didn’t we? Oh my, there was so much going on that day, I could barely swallow all the information coming my way.
October 9th, 2006 at 10:21 pm
That’s right! Though it was actually an Afghan restaurant, unless I’m terribly mistaken.
October 10th, 2006 at 7:23 am
Oh yeah, you’re right. Their kebab was excellent.
October 14th, 2006 at 5:49 pm
Hi! Okay, I’m a lurker. I just recently played TGTTPOAC and Cubert Badbone, and I absolutely adored both of them. I couldn’t even imagine doing both programming and the art for a game — so I must say, I admire your work.